@ganymeed

rain. go out in the rain and feel its drop on your face grass touch it flowers caress them wind feel it and if you can, hug someone

but i'll soon reach it. I really need to die. I can't move on.

knowing that whatever i'll do, THEY will talk about me and they'll judge me. I'm not alone. I'm never alone. I'm always watched. I hate how my own best friend just kept telling me every time someone talked about me, even as a way to punish me when he was angry at me. I have the proofs they talked about me, he told me. I'm so scared. I'm the ultimate news of shitty behavior for 1 minute and then I'll be invisible again. I'm sorry i'm like this. If it can help, I hate myself when I'm in public too. I need to destroy my own tongue and limbs so I can be fucking good and I'lkl never do something wrong ever again.

if you're an artist never draw your ocs with your friend's ocs. The same moment your hyperfix will no more be on them cause they'll take and take and take and take and take and take and take, they'll be so angry at you and you'll be the piece of shit that will need to ask sorry for "stopping drawing them" and leave behind (no true) the friend :( And then, when you try to make some sketches cause yeah, it's no more a fucking hyperfix, you still care about them, the friend will just see you as the devil cause OF COURSE you're drawing them cause you feel PITY :( and you hate them :( OF COURSE OF COUSRE OFC OUSE OF COURSE Which just adds up on how much of a devil you are :)